Well, i guess you are angry thats why you rake up things between me and Cherry. I guess you didn't really know what really happened. We are not like what you think we are. Nonetheless, i take it that you are upset thats why you typed those words in your messages. I have no hard feelings for you.
I'm a very bad dilemma.
I feel sad that i have to leave you alone. I really hope that someone will talk to you and comfort you, be there when you need someone to fall back on as i'm no longer there. I guessed i by replying your smses i only make you feel worse thats why i am keeping silent. Once you have gotten over everything, i don't mind us getting back on talking terms, going out and enjoying each other company. Its ok if you assumed i'm no longer walking this earth. If that will help you to move on, its ok. I'm not important. Your future and life is. And henceforth, i no longer can sing MJ I'll Be There. I don't even want to hear that song. Cause i've broken my promise and it hurts to hear that song when i cannot accomplish what they lyrics taught me.
I want to be there for you to comfort you and all but there's something closing the doors of my heart. I am no longer interested in relationship. Not only that, i am no longer interested in being around people after work or school. I just want to be alone. I've rejected my friends for days when they call me out. I just want to keep the steam in my head, reflect, quietness and seek peace in God by being alone. I hope once i've recovered things can go back to normal.
I know you are going through a tough stage. I hope you'll keep your faith strong and lead your life normally. I may no longer be yours, but i will always be there to assist you in whatever you need help in provided its within my means. I hope you don't drown yourself in sorrow and move on. I know its hard. Been in that situation. I'm sorry for breaking my promise. I'm sorry. I've failed you.
Let me be honest and say that i still care, concerned and love you. Contrary to that, something in me is just stopping me for getting back together. I no longer see women how i used to. Yes, i admire their looks and everything but to commit i don't think so i will. In time to come, i know i'll regret this decision as i will need a companion but i guess i still have to go with my decision. I dunno. Something is not right with me. I dunno if its a pyschological effect or what. I just feel very very different. I guess everyone just leave me alone. It will be for my own good.
At this point of time, i know that i can abuse you physically, financially and emotionally. I know you would give in to my words thats why i don't want to get back to you or stay over at your place tonight. I know other guys out there will take this oppurtunity and abuse it but not Wandi. I've destroyed one girl life and i don't want to destroy another. I'm sorry. I respect your a pride and dignity and i don't want to ruin them cause it will have bad impact on your future. I may be cruel, violent and whatever negative adjectives you can think of but i will never disrespect and abuse you. Its ok if others want to do all these cruel things on me. I swear i believe in karma so its ok. Let them do what they want.
I'm sorry for all these suffering. I'm really sorry. I'm losing words now. You please take care of yourself and don't resort to rubbish. I'm sorry. I beg you please don't dissappoint me. I'm sorry for failing you and breaking my promise. I shall not blame you for being evil to me and the failure of this relationship is not your fault ok. Its just some pyschological effect of me. I'm sorry.


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